Making New Year’s Resolutions is a great idea. And sometimes they help us to make changes. But more often than not, resolutions fail. And if you Google “how to succeed with your New Year’s resolution” you might get an answer count that looks like the national debt.
([Pause.] Nope. I had to check and it came up with only 5,600,000.)
Still, I’m guessing you don’t have time to read all of that. So I have another solution… a RE-solution if you will. (See what I did there?)
Voltaire said, “Judge a man by his questions rather than his answers.” So instead of Googling or trying to figure out answers on how to succeed in your resolutions, goals, etc., you can ask three questions…
First, get clear about what it is you want. Be specific. Remember to include everyone and everything it touches or involves. You also want to be VERY CLEAR that this is, in fact, a goal instead of a preference. If it’s a goal, you’ll be willing to do the work. If you aren’t willing to do the work, then it isn’t a goal. It’s a preference. Then, ask the first question…
1. Why do I want this?
Normally I would say that “why” is a very “heady” question and find it more impactful to go with a more heart-centered approach. However in this case, understanding what achieving the goal means to you as well as how it relates to your overall mission can be very powerful. Once you understand your “why,” you can ask the second question.
2. What would it feel like to achieve, or what would be my experience of achieving, this goal?
Now we’re getting into the aforementioned heart-centered stuff. Visualizing and really “feeling” into the full experience of what it would be like to achieve the goal can be powerful. You might not even have a framework for what the experience of achieving your goal might feel like, but if you allow yourself to imagine the possibilities, you can dramatically move the needle.
The reason is that your brain actually doesn’t know the difference between fantasy and reality. As one of my mentors once said to me, “If you’re going to tell a story, it might as well be a good one.” So give yourself permission to “go there” and fully imagine what it might be like to achieve that thing that has eluded you to this point. You’ll be amazed at the impact.
3. What is the ONE thing that makes everything else easier, if not meaningless?
At the risk of sounding like Curley in City Slickers (hold up one finger here), at the end of the day there is really only one thing that really matters. It is the one thing that makes the difference. It’s the one thing that has the BEST chance of making the BIGGEST impact on your mission. No “multitasking” (don’t get me started on that garbage). No overwhelm. No “I have all of this stuff to do.” There is ONE thing that makes EVERYTHING else easier or perhaps irrelevant. Answer that question, execute on it, and then…
…Ask it again. And again. And again. And at the end of January, or March, or July, we aren’t having the failed resolution conversation. Again.
What are your answers to these three questions? Share your ideas, suggestions, and/or experiences on Facebook! And for inspirational messages (or random goofy stuff) follow me on Twitter, and get more “behind the scenes” stuff on InstaGram.
It’s your kingdom. Make it REIGN

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About the Author -

Executive coach and motivational speaker Chris M. King facilitates the mind shift necessary for professionals and organizations to achieve authentic success and empowerment. Clients experience productivity increases of up to 40%, freedom from burnout and overwhelm, clarity in times of transition, dramatically improved work/life balance, answers to "what's next," creative solutions for innovation, and an overall increase in satisfaction in career and in life. And he does all of this without ever giving advice! Chris doesn't show them THE way. He guides them in finding THEIR way. An emerging thought leader in the men's movement, Chris also works with professional men and women on accountability, vulnerability, and empowerment. He specifically addresses the issues associated with mid-life crises and Peter Pan Syndrome. He is a volunteer for ManKind Project International, a contributing author to The Good Men Project and Elephant Journal, and is honored to be working with Sam Morris as a contributor to Zen Warrior Training®, helping people achieve self-mastery. Chris is also a coach at Project Bully Buster, coaching teens as they navigate the challenges of adolescence. He is honored to work with and support organizations dedicated to the men’s movement, to women's issues, and, as brother to a special needs sister, the US Special Olympics. Chris is currently working on his first book.

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